


When the Days Have No Numbers

by QuackTracks



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Character Development, F/F, Fluff, relationship stumbles, soft angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-26
Updated: 2018-04-26
Packaged: 2019-04-28 09:10:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14446014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuackTracks/pseuds/QuackTracks
Summary: “Ava, I can tell how much you love her, so I’m going to give you some advice: in this instance, in this argument? You were and are correct. Sara knows that.” And then Amaya handed her a slip of paper with coordinates and a time. “She goes here when she feels lost.”





	When the Days Have No Numbers

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a little thing I’ve been wanting to write. I think I might have a collection of Avalance fics where they just make up after fights; some fluffy and some smutty. Idk lol. Or I won’t. Depends on the way the characters take me.
> 
> This is relatively edited but not really.

Ava portalled onto the Waverider with unrelenting purpose, her jaw set firmly and her spine rigid; almost painfully so. She expected to be greeted by an equally stone-faced Sara, and the determination she’d built up for an embarrassingly long amount of time fizzled out at the realization that Sara wasn’t in her room. 

She looked at the light blue sheets and comforter: unmade of course. It looked like Sara had thrown the covers off of her and gone about her day like normal; like she and Ava hadn’t had a particularly awful fight the night before. 

A swell of doubt coasted it’s way into Ava’s thoughts. Maybe it hadn’t affected Sara the way it affected her. Maybe she’d overreacted-

_”Director Sharpe, Captain Lance is not aboard the Waverider.”_

Ava startled out of her thoughts at Gideon’s interruption. 

“Is the team on a mission?”

_”All members of the Legends are present in the kitchen with the exception of Captain Lance.”_

Ava frowned.

“Do you know where she is?”

_”I was given a direct order not to say._ ”

Ava sighed and ran a hand through her hair, her moment of hope dashed.

“Of course you were.”

_”I am not capable of saying, but the team has no such limitation programming.”_

Ava nodded, glad that she finally overcame Gideon’s unhelpful disdain for her. The AI seemed as if she might even feel inclined towards fondness; if one were to squint hard enough. 

Ava departed from Sara’s room and squared herself up once again, her lungs feeling tight beneath her ribs. She wondered what the team felt about the disagreement, if they even knew.

From the way they didn’t seem at all surprised to see her, and the way Ray gave her a hopeful look, Ava assumed they’d heard. She cleared her throat, her hands clasping behind her back and locking in place. 

She’d grown closer with the Legends over the past several months, but she knew Sara would always come first. She was their Captain; their family. 

“I would like to speak with Sara, if any of you are aware of her current location?”

She didn’t want to come off demanding, like she was trying to give an order. Her tone shifted near the end to make them aware that she was truly asking. 

Amaya smiled at her with too much understanding in her eyes and tilted her head toward the entrance Ava had just come through. 

“Walk with me?”

Ava nodded sharply and stepped aside, still stiff as Amaya moved past her. She followed Amaya for a full minute before they came to a stop. 

Amaya looked so calm and relaxed, so unlike how Ava felt herself. She wanted to fidget, but that was a weakness she wouldn’t let show. Amaya smiled.

“Sara mentioned you guys had a bit of a fight.”

Ava swallowed and nodded, trying to release the chorded tension in her shoulders. 

“More than a bit of one. I— I just want to talk to her.”

Amaya reached out and gently gripped Ava’s arm to coax it from its position behind her back. 

“You need to relax first. This isn’t the end of the world. People argue.”

Ava let her arms fall to her sides and respond to Amaya’s soothing presence. She took a deep breath before speaking.

“I know, I know.” 

Ava looked down and studied the white laces of her converse. She wasn’t one to dress down too often, but she never wanted ‘Director’ to be in the most intimate parts of her relationship with Sara. Well, unless Sara was feeling particularly frisky, but—

“Ava, I lost you for a second there.”

Ava startled back into focus and stuffed her hands in the pockets of her jeans. 

“Sorry.” Ava cleared her throat. “Look, I just want to talk to Sara. If you guys don’t think it’s a good idea, I understand. You have known her longer than me.”

Amaya shook her head.

“Sara has been a lot of places and gone through trauma after trauma in the name of justice, revenge, fear... She’s a survivor. And she’s never really settled back and let herself have what wasn’t pertinent to the ‘here and now.’ She doesn’t always understand that you can’t just run away when real things get difficult. I think it will be good for her if you don’t give her space right now.”

Ava’s chest ached for the pain of Sara’s past. Sara talked about it sometimes, in bits when it was the early hours of the morning and Sara had woken shaking and struggling to breathe. Ava would pull her into her body and place her hand on Sara’s chest. Sara was always better at being real when she didn’t have to look Ava in the eyes. 

Sometimes the memories Sara talked about were good, brought up because whatever they were doing had reminded her of her past. Ava had once taken Sara to the batting cages because it was a way she unwound and she wanted to share it with Sara. Sara had spun the bar between her fingers and told Ava how her sister and her had gone almost every weekend for three years before the shipwreck. 

But those good memories were few and far between. 

Ava felt tears press at the corners of her eyes and she pulled out her time currier as a way to keep Amaya from seeing them. 

“If you’ll just tell me where she is I can go—“

“Ava, I can tell how much you love her, so I’m going to give you some advice: in this instance, in this argument? You were and are correct. Sara knows that.” And then Amaya handed her a slip of paper with coordinates and a time. “She goes here when she feels lost.”

Ava slowly took the slip of paper and studied it. She didn’t know where it would lead, but it felt important. She nodded at Amaya so as not to reveal how tight her throat had become. She started inputting the proper location when Amaya touched her arm lightly. 

“Just be careful. This place is far too important to Sara to be marred with bad memories.”

Ava gave a sharp nod of her head opened the portal, somewhat blindly walking through into a sea of green and gray and flits of vivid color. 

Ava let herself cry then, because she’d had a single tragedy in her life, but she was only looking at one of Sara’s. 

The portal closed behind her, and she found herself in a thicket of trees looking over a cemetery. It was sunny and only a little too warm for jeans, but Ava let the heat sink into her without complaint. She stood on the edge of the tree line and took in the scene before her. 

Row upon row of grays and pale browns stretched out left, right, and long. The grass was well-groomed and there were dirt walking paths that suggested people not walk over the graves. 

Singular people stood in front of some graves, groups in front of others. To the east a burial was taking place. 

Ava’s eyes locked into a lone figure fifty yards away wearing a dark, navy hoodie that seemed familiar to the one Sara had stolen from her. Blonde hair spilled somewhat haphazardly around the figure’s shoulders and they were hunched over with their hands around their knees. 

Ava felt soft in that moment, staring at the woman who’d become the biggest part, the most wonderful part of her life. This woman that had rooted herself so deeply in her heart that the thought of losing her was unfathomable. She had to look away a moment, not wanting to forget why she was there. 

_The Previous Night:_

_“You can’t just throw yourself into danger like that, Sara!”_

_Sara was walking through Ava’s kitchen like she didn’t have any stake in the conversation, like she hadn’t taken an unnecessary risk that almost led to her being mortally wounded._

_“Ava, relax. I’m fine.”_

_Ava’s body trembled with leftover terror and present anger. She gripped Sara’s arm and tugged her around, ignoring the way her girlfriend's muscles flexed instinctively. Sara’s eyes sparked with several emotions, the most apparent being annoyance. Ava clenched her teeth painfully before speaking._

_“You almost got shot. Without a thought, you put yourself in the line of fire for_ no _reason. There were other plays to make, other options to work with. You didn’t even think of them.”_

_Sara pulled out of Ava’s grasp and grossed her arms, eyes hard._

_“Options that would’ve taken more time! Options that might not have worked.”_

_Ava couldn’t grasp the reason Sara wasn’t getting this; wasn’t understanding why her actions had Ava in this state._

_“You could’ve_ died _, Sara.”_

_Sara’s eyes flashed with realization before being clouded over by apathy. She shrugged._

_“Wouldn’t be the first time.”_

Ava had stalked out of the kitchen and to her room, ignoring the soft call of her name from Sara’s lips. She’s locked herself away and left Sara to make her way back to the Waverider. She’d broken down on her sheets that smelled too much like Sara. 

She knew Sara hadn’t meant it, that she didn’t truly feel so flippant about her own life and the people she would hurt should she die, but Ava had felt it like a blade through her ribs. 

Now, as she slowly made her way to Sara, she felt sure of Sara’s false bravado. 

She walked past a young man and woman standing with flowers in front of a small headstone, rounded onto the path closest to Sara, and never once took her eyes off of her. 

Sara didn’t react at all until Ava was standing a few feet behind her.

“Amaya?”

Ava let out a breath, her eyes finally leaving Sara to study the grave she sat in front of. 

_Laurel Lance  
A hero in every sense. _

There were two bouquets of purple Asters, one withering, one sharply fresh. Single roses were laid on the ground in front of the stone in various forms of decay. Ava moved the last remaining steps and stood beside Sara’s curled form. 

“Asters… love and patience with the power to drive away demons.”

Sara chuckled softly and finally looked up, her eyes dry but full of so much sorrow that Ava’s legs felt they might give out. 

“Of course you would know that.” 

Sara released the hold she had on her legs and tentatively reached up, an invitation and a bridge to close the distance. Ava let their fingers intertwine, and she slowly lowered herself beside Sara. Neither let go. Sara looked back at the flowers resting right under the inscription on the stone. 

“The word Aster… it comes from asteri.” Sara looked down at the grass between her bent knees. “Star.” Sara’s fingers tightened in Ava’s. “She was as bright and brilliant as the sun. You would’ve liked her.”

Ava had never seen Sara like this. Sara was so brave, so unflinchingly strong; so very bad at being vulnerable. Ava kept quiet, wanting to give Sara the space and time to express herself. Sara picked at the strands of grass beneath her with her free hand. 

“I loved her so much, but I never treated her like I did. I was never all that good to her. Not until the end. Her life was wrought with as much loss as mine, but she never did anything to deserve it.”

Ava bit back the argument that Sara didn’t deserve her suffering either. She knew it would be unwelcome in this moment. Sara huffed out a tired laugh. 

“Sometimes… God, I imagine what one more day with her would look like. What would we do? What would I say to her? Would I be able to let her go?” 

Sara sniffed and her words caught in her lungs. They sat in silence for a long time. Then,

“I’m sorry about last night, Aves.”

Ava brought Sara’s hand to her and pressed a soft kiss to the back of it. She still said nothing. Sara looked appreciative as she found Ava’s eyes.

“I just… I forget sometimes. I forget that my life is important to other people. I spent so long feeling like if I had stayed dead, Laurel would never have died. A part of me wanted to die because I felt like I deserved it; I felt like it was the only way to atone for everything that I’d done.”

Ava breathed slow and steady, hoping to remain strong so that Sara knew she was allowed to fall apart. Sara took a shakier breath. 

“I love you a lot. More than I thought I could love somebody. It’s painful sometimes, how much. And it scares me.”

Ava closed her eyes and tried not to cry, speaking for the first time.

“Sara, I’m going to spend as long as you’ll have me making sure you know how important your life is to me. Despite how stubborn you are, I’ll make sure you know. And so will your team. I don’t— when I saw you step into the line of fire, I saw everything that I cared about crash around me in an instant. I couldn’t even breathe and I would’ve done anything at all to make sure you stayed alive.”

Sara nodded and bit her lip, thumb brushing along the side of Ava’s thumb.

“I’ll be more careful next time. I’ll— I won’t make those kinds of decisions alone. I know I’m not alone anymore.”

“That’s all I want. That’s all your annoying team wants.”

Sara laughed then, loudly and unrestrained in the most beautiful way. She scooted herself closer to Ava and tucked into her side, her forehead against Ava’s neck and her arms around Ava’s stomach. 

“They really like you, you know? Amaya thinks you’re good for the team. Zari thinks it’s funny how people are scared of you. She’s also a little scared of you. Mick would never say it, but he respects your strength a whole helluva lot. Ray just seems to like everybody. Nate told me that I would be an idiot to let you go.”

Ava wrapped her arms around Sara’s shoulders and rested her chin on Sara’s head.

“Now I just have to work on Gideon, huh?”

Sara hummed, her fingers tight in the fabric of Ava’s sweater. 

“She likes you too. She told me I was dumb last night.”

Ava kissed Sara’s forehead.

“I tried to tell you you were dumb too. Good thing you listened to the robot.”

Sara pinched her side playfully.

“Artificial Intelligence. First thing to get Gideon to like you is not degrading her to the status of a robot.”

Ava smiled and felt the pieces in her heart click back in place. 

“My sincerest apologies. Don’t tell her I said that.”

Sara let out a soft chuckle.

“Zari told me last night that I wasn’t allowed to die because then the Director of the Time Bureau would destroy time all over again trying to figure out how to bring me back.”

Ava wanted to deny it. She wanted to say she would be strong enough to follow the rules she found so important, the rules she constantly berated Sara and her team for not following. She couldn’t. 

“She’s right. I should probably have that written into a directive. Remove from Directorship should anything ever happen to Sara Lance.”

Sara pulled back and met Ava’s eyes, the determination and adoration in sharp relief against the blue. Ava kissed her softly, her lips capturing Sara’s bottom one. It was chastely sweet and short, but full of everything they had and hadn’t said. Ava pulled back. 

“We can stay here as long as you want to, Sara.”

Sara gave her an appreciative smile. 

“That’s probably good. The team is going to give us so much shit when we get back.”

Ava smirked and shrugged. 

“We could always just go to my house. They can stew for a little bit.”

Sara’s eyes narrowed playfully. 

“I think you’ve been spending too much time with the wrong crowd, Aves.”

Ava pursed her lips thoughtfully. 

“I wouldn’t say that.”

Sara grinned.

“Fine. Then what do you think about going back to the team two weeks from now and saying we’ve just been busy?”

Ava chuckled.

“Maybe that would be more funny and less devastating if our jobs weren’t so important.”

Sara sighed in faux regret. 

“You’re right.” A couple beats of silence, then she added, “Do you mind going back a couple minutes before me? I just want to say goodbye.”

Ava kissed her once more. 

“Of course not. Take as much time as you need.”

**Author's Note:**

> I know that’s not where Laurel is buried, but I altered it a bit to fit the story. 
> 
> Let me know what you thought!


End file.
